Vulnerability

I expect that we are days, weeks at the most, away from releasing our book into the world.  I'm incredibly excited as this has been a five year process!!!! But... I'm also incredibly afraid. Not long ago, I was relaying this fear to Larissa... about the potential for people near and far to know so very much about me.  To be so vulnerable.  She led me right then and there to Brene Brown. If you haven't already watcher her Tedtalk on the power of vulnerability, do yourself a favor and watch it here: 

 https://www.ted.com/talks/brene_brown_on_vulnerability?language=en

One of my favorite parts is when she says:

"It’s not the critic who counts; not the man who points out how the strong man stumbles or where the doer of deeds could have done them better.
The credit belongs to the man who is actually in the arena, whose face is marred by dust and sweat and blood; who strives valiantly . . . who at best knows the triumph of high achievement and who at the worst, if he fails, at least fails while daring greatly.The first time I read this quote, I thought, This is vulnerability. Everything I’ve learned from over a decade of research on vulnerability has taught me this exact lesson. Vulnerability is not knowing victory or defeat, it’s understanding the necessity of both; it’s engaging. It’s being all in."

So after I watched her Ted talk and really thought about all she had to say... so much goodness... so much beauty, I realized that vulnerability might be the most powerful teaching tool in my possession.  Ever since I got sober, I've hoped that all those trials, all the struggle, all that badness could be turned into something good, something powerful, something helpful.  But I have to also acknowledge that only if I open myself up, go all in, accept vulnerability, can I potentially help others avoid my pitfalls.  Brene Brown says we are "hungry for people to admit, 'I made a mistake,'" rather than attempting to show the world how perfect they are.  Well, I assure you that I am not perfect.  And I made plenty of mistakes.  I'm willing to put myself out there, all in, to help others. And honestly, if only one person benefits from this book, the last five years will still be worth it.   

I used to chase any number of escape methods in order to avoid vulnerability. The irony is that I stood to gain the most and be the best me by, instead, embracing the very thing I was running from.  How often in this life is that the case? How often do we run away from the very thing that could most help us? 

I hope you will join me in embracing vulnerability; using it for instruction, for growth, and to be humbled enough to rely on God.  It's a lifelong process....but so far it has made all the difference. 

xoxo

Lenaya